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POLITICAL SCIENCE FOR DUMMIES
DEMOCRAT
You have two cows.
Your neighbour has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
You push for higher taxes so the government can provide cows for everyone.

REPUBLICAN
You have two cows.
Your neighbour has none.
So?

SOCIALIST
You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbour.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST
You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, CANADIAN STYLE
You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pour the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one. You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION
 You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You drink some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You drink some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION
You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION
You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.
 
POLISH CORPORATION
You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

BELGIAN CORPORATION
You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.

FLORIDA CORPORATION
You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best looking cow.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION
You have millions of cows.
They make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegal.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.
Thursday June 23, 2011
Canadian Acreage Report

Here is a recap of the Stats Can Preliminary Seeded estimates.  The survey was conducted late May to June 3rd.  This was done before the full effect of all the flooding was known by the farmers.  Hence we feel the canola acreage of 19.8 MM acres is over stated.  We feel a more realistic number would be in the 18.0 (or sub 18) to maybe 18.5 MM acres.

The wild card will be yields as many of these acres are seeded on less than ideal seeding conditions.  Some was sown by air, with no seed incorporation, hoping it germinates.  Thus acres may be there, but what will the yield and quality be?  Weather has been very extreme and we have a lot of summer left.

Thus this report in a lot of respects does not help and truer numbers will only be know after the July 31 report comes out.  Hope this helps.

Statistics Canada released its Preliminary Estimates of Principal Field Crop Areas report this morning. The Canadian survey was carried out between May 25 and June 3. Stats Can estimates the sample for the planting survey consisted of about 25,000 farms, which is double the numbers questioned for the intentions forecast released in April.

Of particular interest to Doane's Commercial Advisory clients are Wheat and Canola plantings. Farmers indicated that they were expanding plantings of both crops. But Statistics Canada properly notes in its general comments that inclement weather in the eastern Prairies had caused delays and had created uncertainty for farmers about which crop to plant. There will be a new survey in July with results released on August 24. The U.S. futures market may not pay much attention to the report as plunging crude oil prices are producing bearish sentiment for many commodities.

Wheat

Statistics Canada says farmers intend to plant 23.568 million acres or 9.537 million hectares to wheat. That is down from the intentions forecast at 24.724 million or 10.005 million hectares to all classes of wheat. Plantings last year totaled 21.065 million acres or 8.524 million hectares. A recent survey found Canadian analysts estimating wheat plantings would total between 21.5 million and 23.5 million acres. Today's forecast came in at the high end of the range, but will be discounted on the assumption that rains in June continued to impede plantings and final plantings will be down from this survey. Last year the June report indicated 23.72 million planted amidst a similar period of planting delays.

Canola

Statistics Canada says farmers intend to plant 19.800 million acres or 8.013 million hectares to canola. That is up from the intentions forecast at 19.225 million acres or 7.780 million hectares to canola. It would be a record. Plantings last year totaled 16.818 million acres or 6.806 million hectares. A recent survey found Canadian analysts estimating canola plantings would total between 17.25 million to 18.25 million acres. Even assuming that a significant portion of acres went unseeded, actual plantings may still well exceed the high end of the forecast range. In 2010 when farmers also suffered through severe delays from rains, final acres came down about one million from intentions. Every year is unique and there can be no guarantees, but this one example suggests that 2011 plantings could well exceed 18 million and easily set a new record.

Courtesy of
Hart Barham
Economist
Doane Advisory Services
Monday  June 6, 2011
W.Canada planting 80% finished - Wheat Board

 * Planting unlikely to resume in flooded zones
 * Most of Prairies to finish seeding this week

WINNIPEG, Manitoba, June 6 (Reuters) - Western Canada's farmers have planted 80 percent of their crops, behind normal progress, with parts of Saskatchewan and Manitoba likely to stay fallow this year due to
wetness, a Canadian Wheat Board official said on Monday.

Normally, the region has seeded 93 percent of crops by this time.  Across most of the Prairies, farmers will finish planting this week to beat crop insurance deadlines of between June 10-20, said Stuart
McMillan, crop and weather analyst for the Wheat Board.

It's a different story in flooded southeastern Saskatchewan and southwestern Manitoba, which may get even more rain this week, McMillan said.   "Realistically, at this point, I don't know that even tremendously
favorable weather would undo the volume of rain they have received," he said.
Planting delays extend, with lesser severity, as far west as the Alberta foothills of the Canadian Rockies, McMillan said. Those areas are usually finished at this time of year, but this year have about 20
percent of seeding to go.  Farmers in southeast Saskatchewan grow mostly durum and spring wheat,
legume crops and some canola. In southwest Manitoba, wheat and canola are popular.

Planting progress has nosed past last year's progress of 78 percent complete, however in 2010, the region received steady rains that ultimately left the biggest unplanted area in decades.  A week ago, farmers had completed 73 percent of planting.  Late planting isn't the only problem for farmers. Cooler than normal
temperatures for the past week have slowed growth of crops and limited evaporation of excess water, McMillan said. Later planting can also reduce yields and quality.
(Reporting by Rod Nickel; Editing by Marguerita Choy) 

 

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